CAROL, MY THIRD WIFE, always professed in metaphor that our lives were made up of chapters, and she further believed that these chapters often did not flow smoothly from one to the other. That became our story. The shift in scenery, plots, and partners filled the pages as we decoupled after twelve years of togetherness.
The real question is, is this a good thing? Looking back on one's life seems to fill many of my acquaintances’ livelihoods, which never sat well with me. I have always tried to look forward with optimism and purpose to develop the next chapters. The adage, “Two steps forward and one back,” seems most fitting for me.
We had a nice run for a dozen years after we came together moving away from unhealthy marriages. We tried to sail into the sunset with our blended families. It didn’t quite happen. Sharing and collectively raising our four children was a challenge and she excelled in this skill set - I did not. The real storm came as we launched a new business that ran into financial difficulty featuring negative cash flow. That chapter capsized the boat.
It was time to swim to shore and move on. We have survived and prospered. Fifteen years helps mend the wounds from life’s events.
Speaking of one foot back, I miss playing golf with Carol as she was fun, and we often expressed our appreciation for each other’s improving game. It was one of our better chapters. I think it would be inappropriate for me to ask her to join me for an evening of golf now that she has remarried. But society sure is changing fast, so perhaps this isn’t such a far-fetched idea.
When I send her this essay, she will likely remain pleasant and offer a raincheck.
Two steps forward and one back.